Stop Asking Me if I Still Drink!
Why this Question Annoys the Crap Outta Me (4 min read)
Running Low No Drinker sometimes feels like standing in the middle of a very noisy tug of war. On one side, there are those who want me to be completely alcohol free, proclaiming the evils of alcohol at the top of my lungs. On the other hand, there are those who don't see why people can't just 'chill out, have a few, go home and shut up about it.
And somewhere in the middle is me, trying to talk about drinking differently without declaring myself the poster child for one camp or the other.
In producing over 100 episodes of the Low No Drinker Podcast, I have never once asked a guest if they still drink alcohol. Because it's none of my business, and quite frankly, it's irrelevant.
And yet it's a question I get asked almost every week. As if my answer somehow qualifies or excludes me from speaking on the topics that I share.
As if my personal choice is the key that unlocks whether I’m allowed to have this conversation at all.
Is my journey to a life less intoxicated less valid if I'm not wholly and instantly 100% sans alcohol?
This used to be such a big barrier for me. I would be invited to guest on other people's podcasts, and I remember being almost apologetic in my language when they asked about how/why I got involved in the low/no alcohol space:
"Oh, it's not that interesting really, I used to work in hospitality and I really like the drinks...", or "Well, I don't really have a story, I just..." Or worse still, I'd compare myself to others and then disqualify myself: "My story's not special..." I would say.
Well, bollocks to that. I am special (my mum said so), and so is my story. But...
What I've since realised is that I don't actually need a special story, a pivotal moment, a great epiphany or rock bottom despair.
If I want to make a positive choice to improve my life by not hanging out my arse for three days out of every seven, then that's reason enough.
And you know what, I'm not alone.
I Was Sick of the Judgment and Fearmongering
When I first started looking for alcohol-free options, every article I read, or social media post I saw came with a warning label: “If you’re looking for alcohol-free drinks, maybe you’ve got a problem.” I hated that assumption.
And honestly, I think that's part of the problem.
The assumption that wanting to reduce or remove alcohol is only for those who have a "problem" with it stops so many people from exploring their options without fear of judgment or a barrage of questioning.
I wanted to know about what I could drink when I didn't feel like getting pissed, where I could go, what I could do. I wasn't looking for judgey assertions about my habits, empty platitudes about how wonderful life could be on the pink cloud, or fearmongering statistics about the perils of booze.
Newsflash - We're adults, we know booze is bad for us.
Don't get me wrong, I'm well aware and entirely in agreement that alcohol absolutely can and has ruined lives, and I desperately want those people to get the help that they need (alcoholchange.uk is a great place to start).
But most of the people I speak to — listeners, readers, people at events, even industry folk — aren’t looking for lifelong sobriety. They just want to feel better. To find their off switch sooner. To drink on their terms without being guilted in either direction.
So if that's you, then you're who I’m here for.
Why This Will Never Be a Sobriety Platform
Honestly, it would be easier to brand Low No Drinker as a straight-up sobriety platform. The message would be clearer, the boundaries tidier. But it wouldn’t be true to me.
I want to talk to the people in the middle. The ones who know something needs to shift but aren’t sure what that looks like yet.
The ones who want support without expectation, and who want to explore low/no options without having to commit to “forever sober.”
Does it make things harder for me? Yep! But so be it. If I can help a few more people feel confident making small changes earlier, maybe fewer would end up needing more drastic intervention later.
And you know what? Maybe sobriety is the final destination for some. But the route to get there looks different for everyone, and I worry that that message gets lost. Too often, teetotalism is painted as the righteous path and moderation as the devil’s playground. But that's bullshit. There are as many routes as there are people walking them, and you’re entitled to explore whichever serves you best.
So, Do I Still Drink?
Honestly, it doesn’t matter.
What matters is whether you still drink, or don’t, or sometimes do, or sometimes want to drink less. Don't worry about what other people around you (including me) are doing. This is your life, your journey, your choice.
You might want total abstinence. Or just to cut back for a while. Or perhaps you're trying to find your sweet spot somewhere in between. And all of that is valid.
Wow, so much of this resonated with me and my sobriety journey. I haven’t had a chance to check out your podcast yet, but will add it to my listen list!